Weekly Ramblings – Memorial Day Edition

We gotta be honest with you – it doesn’t feel like Memorial Day Weekend. We had a conversation this week where we were told someone was unavailable because “it’s a holiday weekend.” Usually, we would understand this excuse, but it struck us as a little odd. So, we pressed. “What exactly do you have planned for your holiday weekend?” The answer? Nothing. They have nothing planned. But that is apparently still better than spending time with us, and that is in no way depressing at all. 

Fortunately for you, we won’t make the same excuse. We’re here to rescue your Memorial Day weekend. Who needs trips to the beach, parties at the pool or cooking out with friends when you can read a fresh post on Work Hangover?  

Don’t answer that. On to the Weekly Ramblings… 

Golf’s Return 

We mentioned last week how Rory McIlroy, Dustin Johnson, Matthew Wolfe and Rickie Fowler were playing a match to help raise money to support those impacted by COVID-19.  While this match was slightly less intense than a fourball session on Saturday at the Ryder Cup, it was still entertaining. A couple reactions: 

Dustin Johnson was the MVP of the day. Not because he played particularly well – he didn’t – but because of just his general DJ-ness. Highlights included using a tee as a ball marker on a green (who hasn’t done this), walking off a tee box without his golf bag (the players all carried their own bags) and a pace of play that we should all strive for.  He nearly murdered a cameraman who had set up directly in front of a tee box with a drive because, we can only assume, that the four seconds it would take for the cameraman to move was way too long. 

Matthew Wolfe played the role of “guy who doesn’t fit in” to perfection. He talked too much, he made bad jokes and he looked ridiculous with his Fu Manchu. He was the nerd who in high school who ended up in a group project with the jocks and was constantly overdoing it to try to fit in and be one of the guys. It was awkward and sad and pitiful and kind of hilarious.  And that definitely doesn’t describe our high school experience. Nope. Just that’s what we’ve heard could happen. 

Seminole lived up to its reputation as a ridiculously challenging course. When the teams completed 18 and there were several skins still up for grabs, they went to the famed par 3 17th hole for a closest to the pin competition. Full disclosure, we didn’t know it was famed until they told us on TV. But we can see why now.  Anyway, in regular play, 1 out of the 4 players hit the green with their tee shot. So, for the tie breaker, they all played a shot from 120 yards and the closest to the pin wins the tiebreaker. Only 2 of the 4 hit the green from 120 yards and Rory won it by hitting about his shot to about 12 feet. For reference, this year on the PGA Tour, the 200th ranked player in percentage of greens hit from 125 yards managed to hit the green 76% of the time. Only 125 players keep their tour status each year. So yeah, that’s a tough hole. And if any of the members at Seminole are reading this, we welcome the invitation to try the 17th hole for ourselves. As well as the rest of the golf course. 

NCAA Voluntary Activities 

The first step toward having fall sports was announced this week, with the NCAA voting to allow voluntary athletically related activities to begin as early as June 1, at the discretion of each school. Actually, first they proposed the June 1 date for just football, men’s basketball and women’s basketball. Later, they said all sports.  It hasn’t received much attention, but in our eyes, this was another blunder by the NCAA which they corrected before they got lambasted. (And yes, we take any chance we can to use the word lambasted). Here’s a transcript of the conversation: 

NCAA1: Hey – we’re in a global pandemic, but we think it’s ok to bring large groups of 18-22-year-old amateur athletes to live together, work out together and practice sports.  

NCAA2: Great idea! But, how do we pick which sports can start? Maybe we should let the ones that play in the fall come back first so they have time to get ready for the season?  

NCAA1: I don’t know. What if we just randomly picked a couple sports? Like, say, football, men’s basketball and women’s basketball? 

NCAA2: That makes much more sense. Let’s do it. Soccer and volleyball and cross country can just get ready for their seasons in a couple weeks. I mean, how hard can those sports be? 

Two days later… 

NCAA3: Hey guys…you only picked revenue sports, and you know, we’re kind of in this identity crisis of the blurred lines between amateurism and college athletics.  Can we maybe just let all the sports come back?  

NCAA1: Huh? 

NCAA2: I guess…I’m confused. 

NCAA3: Big gulps, huh? Welp, see you around! 

NBA in...Disney 

At one point, there was discussion of quarantining all the NBA players in Vegas, having them live in a hotel there and play out the rest of the season. If you’re looking for reality television, this was a gold mine of an idea, sponsored by Trojan. It would have been great.  

Well, the concept is the same, but we’re likely headed to a slightly different location. Disney. We won’t make up another conversation, but pretty sure Adam Silver heard the Vegas idea and pulled a Constanza and said let’s do the complete opposite. Disney here we come! 

American Tennis 

Earlier this week, the 2009 Wimbledon final between Andy Roddick and Roger Federer was being aired. A friend watched it and pointed out to us that Roddick’s 2003 win at the US Open is the most recent Grand Slam title in men’s tennis. As a math major, we can tell you that was 17 years ago. There have been 65 Grand Slam Champions in that time.  Here’s the breakdown: 

Federer/Nadal/Djokovic – 55 wins 

Everyone else in the world – 10 wins 

Americans – 0 

In the 65 Grand Slams prior to 2004, Americans won 27 of them. Now, there’s a pretty good argument to be made that Federer, Nadal and Djokovic are the three greatest men’s tennis players of all time. After all, the three of them are atop the list of all-time grand slam champions. However, there hasn’t been an American male who has really even been a threat to win a grand slam title.  

Once our good friend Dr. Wang hung up his racquet in 2002 to focus his time on culinary explorations like Mac and Cheese with Gravy complimented with a refreshing Tito’s and Fresca, American tennis has never been the same.  

Two questions remain: 

  • Will an American male ever win another Grand Slam again? 
  • Can someone make me a Tito’s & Fresca? That sounds delightful. 

The Match, Part Deux 

Tiger vs. Phil again, this time not for $24.99 PPV that ends up not working. We’ve already improved, and they haven’t swung a club yet. As we’ve mentioned, there are some slight differences to The Match – namely a different golf course, and more people playing. Namely, Tom Brady and Peyton Manning. We’ll absolutely be watching, and it seems like the content should be pretty good – all four will be mic’d up, Justin Thomas will be an on-course reporter and Charles Barkley will be providing commentary. 

We’ll have a more in-depth review of The Match later, but we can tell that this is a group of guys in their forties with kids, as they’ll each be driving golf carts, unlike those young whippersnappers who were walking and carrying their own bags last week. Punks. Between the foursome, we have multiple knee surgeries, a few back surgeries, a neck fusion and rheumatoid arthritis. Just your average Friday low-ball group at the local country club.  

We know return you to your normal Memorial Day activities. Just wear a mask. 

Published by workhangover

I'm a blog, mostly about sports. Come for the gripping analysis, stay for the witty jokes.

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